NEW YORK – Clarke Schmidt didn’t cry when the doctor told him he needed Tommy John surgery. He just nodded, clasped his hands on his knees, and looked out the hospital window. Not a single sob. But they say some people only cry when no one is watching.
That day, Schmidt couldn’t throw more than four pitches against the Blue Jays. As he left the mound, he clenched his glove tightly, as if trying to hold on to something that was about to disappear. And yes – just hours later, the MRI confirmed: a torn UCL – which meant the season was over, and so were his hopes for his first All-Star.
“I knew I was wrong – I just didn’t dare admit it”
Not everyone knew: Schmidt had been feeling the pain since mid-June. But he still played. Still threw almost perfectly. Still stood firm as a pillar of a Yankees squad dreaming of the World Series.
“I was afraid of losing my chance. Afraid that if I sat out, someone would replace me better. Afraid that I would no longer be the number one choice.” – Schmidt shared in a quiet Zoom interview after the injury.
And that was what hurt him the most. Not the torn ligament. But the betrayal of his self-confidence.
In the days after the surgery, Schmidt lived a secluded life. He avoided social media. He avoided his teammates. Avoiding even his own eyes in the mirror.
“I used to think of myself as a warrior. Someone who could handle any pressure. But sitting alone with an IV and a dusty glove… I was just a kid who had lost his playground,” he wrote in his private diary, revealed through relatives.
“The scariest thing for an athlete is not a broken bone,” a sports expert once said. “It’s the feeling that everything is out of control. The schedule, the body, the career, the expectations – all of it shatters like a baseball hitting a rotten bat.”
And Schmidt is facing it, in the harshest way.
“I don’t expect fans to forgive me for not being on the field. I just hope to be able to forgive myself – for ignoring the cries of my body, for sacrificing so much and forgetting one thing: no one can carry everything forever.” – Schmidt wrote.
Despite losing the entire 2025 season, Clarke Schmidt has signed up for an intensive rehabilitation program. He will not throw a ball for at least 12 months. But this time, he is not racing. Not trying to regain his footing. He simply wants to stand firm again – for himself.
“If I return to the field, I will not throw for the contract, for the score, or for the position. I will throw for the child inside me – the one who dreamed of just playing, even for one season,” – he said.
Clarke Schmidt was once the hope, the sharp spearhead of the Yankees. But today, he is an ordinary person – learning to love himself, learning to admit his weaknesses, and learning from the beginning how to stand up after a seemingly impossible fall.
And perhaps, that is the most valuable thing in an athlete: not the number of times they win, but the number of times they dare to start again – after everything falls apart.